all HIS fault

My life has no up right now; only down. HE disappeared two weeks ago. Since then Ive had no motivation to do anything and yet Ive had to do everything. I HAD to move my things back into my moms house, I HAD to buy a new bed (bought a fouton so I'd have more room), I HAD to spend money to drive back to Oxnard to get stuff out of my storage unit (that I still have stuff in). Now Im pretty broke and living back in my moms house again with no job. I usually wouldn't say this, but I hate HIM right now. I really do. I have so many questions and so much to say to HIM and yet I know that I wont get a listening ear or any answer to what I ask. I have never felt such frustration towards somebody until now; not even my dad. Every day does get better though; I havent cried since last week and I only thought about HIM a little bit today...