I Feel Horrible...

Well, I might as well just say it...Im a horrible person! I just went onto a friends MySpace and saw that she's getting married. I know I should feel happy and joyous for her, but to be honest Im actually really sad. Not for her though; for myself. I know I know...Im jealous (I have no problem admitting that) and Im a horrible person for feeling this way. Im on the verge of tears and for what?...because Ive paid many more dues than neccessary in this stupid "dating" world and to what avail? Im a good girl, an even better girlfriend, and I deserve happiness too! Where is MY prince charming? Maybe I should have just married Steve 6 years ago (I often wonder how that would have turned out); I wonder if Im being punished in some way for not going along with the "plan" that was intended for me. I think Im at a breaking point right now; somethings gotta give....